Why hidest Thou Thyself in times of trouble?
...Then answered the Lord unto Job out of the whirlwind and said: Gird up thy loins like a man; I will demand of thee, and declare thou unto me. Wilt thou also disannul My judgment? Will thou condemn Me, that thou mayest be righteous? [Job 40]
Sometimes, I wished I could say the same thing to God and challenge Him to give me an answer to my inner quandary.
In my clear conscience I have done no premeditated wrong; neither have I acted out of pure malice. Is it right to test me, or judge me, when I know that all I have done was nothing short of trying to be a good person, albeit with my own imperfections?
Yet I feel hemmed in. Have You hedged me in, and made me hard pressed? The wicked will not stand on the day of Judgment, or so You said Yourself. And yet You also opened a way for sinners to return to You.
How then is it that You continue your sore displeasure against me? Is this the mercy You promised to the sinner who wets his bed with tears at night? If so, why not extirpate and expunge me in Your divine wrath?
Just so frustrated.